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Raccoons, Raccoons, Everywhere Raccoons

July 5, 2010
by

I wrote this closer to the time of our Gatlinburg trip, but forgot to post it….

This goes under the category of “Are YOU kidding me!?”

The same evening we saw a bear beside our car, Reid and I are relaxing in the hot tub. I could have fallen asleep, I was that relaxed.

Til Reid moved the fallen cover that was leaning against the hot tub and jumped back. I thought he had electrocuted himself and he didn’t speak for a few seconds. He then tells me that there’s some kind of animal back there, possibly a dog.

He gathers his courage and takes a better look. It’s a raccoon just a few feet away from his face staring at him.

I think we forget that we’re in the woods and there really are wild animals.

I start curling up in a ball and talking in a high voice because I’m thinking this stupid raccoon is going to jump in the hot tub and he’s going to claw us to death. Death by raccoon, I can see it now.

This is what I pictured:

Reid assures me the raccoon doesn’t want in the hot tub and convinces me to run inside while he stands between me and the animal.

After explaining the story to Dustin, my brother-in-law, he tells us to just shoo it away, like its a cat! Then, we realize we can look down from our porch upstairs and see it on the bottom deck.

This is no cat. This thing is massive.

After watching Dustin try to scare it using a pool stick, throw water balloons, and shoot a water gun at it, it attacks it’s first victim Ariel the mermaid.

Kilee, my niece, had left her beloved Ariel outside by the hot tub and apparently the raccoon is in mating season and Ariel was looking good in her bikini. Poor, Ariel, will never be the same.

Eventually, the raccoon realizes he’s unwelcome and crawls down the railing.

Later in the week, Reid and I are about to get in the hot tub again and there’s another, smaller raccoon asleep.

We later noticed that this raccoon had actually been in/around the hot tub because it had chewed on one of the head rests! And Reid told me earlier that it wouldn’t get in the water with us? Uh, I think so!

No more hot tubbing for me that week because I didn’t want to get rabies from the water. I know that’s not how it works, but I couldn’t mentally relax knowing an animal could join us at any time. I’ll stick to my bubble baths at home.

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