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Hindsight

February 25, 2010
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During my run last night I went by my old middle school several times. I was thinking about what I was like as an 8th grader that had just moved from another state. And how I wish I could go back and take my 13 year old self to get coffee and talk to her.

I’d tell her that she’s not fat or ugly. That those girls she watches practicing cheerleading that she wishes she could be like are just as insecure as she is. Even though you don’t have Timberland boots, a Sak purse, and CK jeans like all the other girls, you’ll be ok. It’s not as big of a deal as she thinks.

That she may think she has no friends, but that girl she’s been passing notes with named Whitney will actually turn into a great friend; you’ll even be in each other’s weddings.

That if a boy likes you, he’ll tell you. You don’t have to drop your books in front of him in hopes he’ll pick them up and notice you. And when he doesn’t pick them up, stop wasting your time. Most junior high boys are losers, anyway. Besides, she may be in junior high right now, but her future husband is currently in college. And we all know college guys are cooler than junior high boys.

I’d tell her to relax and stop worrying about her hair, clothes, and pale skin and try to enjoy this awkward time in life. To stop trying to be like everyone else and appreciate who she is and who she’ll become.

And I’d warn her that high school may seem scary and the girls may be a little mean, but she’ll survive and it won’t be as bad as she thinks it is at the time. She’ll have a lot of great memories. And that college will be awesome.

I’m sure there’s lots more that I’d tell her, but I don’t know how much time we’d have. Plus, some things she needs to figure out for herself.

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2 Comments leave one →
  1. February 25, 2010 11:38 am

    Ah, yes…the CK jeans, Saks purse, and Timberland boots…oh and Birkenstocks…..NO THEY AREN’T AND WEREN’T IMPORTANT, but we wanted them so badly. I was there, Ash, I don’t miss those things. Could you imagine the wisdom that you could impart to that girl if she’d listen?

    I’m glad we’re friends. I really love the Ashley that I know. I’m sorry you had to experience those things, but I’m glad you did…so we could be friends.

  2. February 25, 2010 6:02 pm

    Oh, if we only knew then what we know now, life would have been so much easier. While reading this I couldn’t help but think about all of the mean cheerleaders at my school who are now twice as big as they were back then. Karma got them, it got them good…….

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